You know, less than one family out of seven in the Soviet Union owns an automobile. Most of the automobiles are driven by bureaucrats. The government furnishes them, and the drivers and so forth. So an order went out one day to the police that anyone caught speeding , anyone, no matter who, gets a ticket.
Well, Gorbachev came out of his country home, his dacha. He was late getting to the Kremlin. There was his limousine and driver waiting. He told the driver to get into the back seat — he’d drive.. and down the road he went… And they pass two motorcycle cops. One took out after him. And pretty soon he is back with his buddy. And his buddy says, “Well, did you give him a ticket?” And he said, “No.” “What,” he said, “Why not?” “Oh,” he said, ” He’s too important.” “Well,” he said, “We are told to give anybody a ticket, no matter who it is!” “Oh,” he says, “No, no,” he says, “This was… I couldn’t.” “But who was it?” He said, “I couldn’t recognize him. But his driver was Gorbachev.”
He would live to see the walls come down all across the world. A process no doubt hastened along by his relentless mockery of communism as something both barbaric and laughable
The commissar in the Soviet Union, who went out into one of those state collective farms, grabbed the first worker he came to. Said, How are the crops? Oh, he said, the crops have never been better, just wonderful. He said, how about potatoes? Oh, he said, comrade commissar, if we could put the potatoes in one pile they would reach the foot of god. And the commissar said, this is the Soviet Union, there is no god. He said, that’s alright, there are no potatoes.
Reagan clearly relished the job. Missing no opportunity to joke about his favorite targets – communism, big government, high taxes.
If the big spenders get there way, they’ll charge everything on your taxpayers express card and believe me, they never leave home without it
And if his campaign were a Broadway show it would be promises…promises…
We cannot play innocents abroad in a world that is not innocent.
My fellow Americans. I’m pleased to announce that I’ve signed legislation outlawing the Soviet Union. We begin bombing in five minutes.